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bonnes vacances!

stupid tagboard has been down for gdness how long already. have no choice but to switch to another one. and finally i have the time to blog. ok not really as im not done with my packing and my train leaves in 2 hours' time!!

am so happy that the holidays are finally here! a gd time to take a breather and have a short overseas trip. if only they were longer, i could have gone to further countries. nvm, id leave that for december. for this break, im gonna visit frenz in london and oxbridge. it wld be nice to speak rapidly in singlish on a daily basis, instead of speaking mostly proper french at a slower pace haha =) MOE should really review their 3rd lang syllabus. there's not much use in drilling so much grammar in areas like e gerundive and subjunctive mood, as well as the awful past participle and conditional tense for hypothetical situations. as if in daily life, i wld be going on and on about "if i WERE bill gates, i WOULD donate 50% of my fortune to charity" or "if it IS sunny tomorrow, we WILL go to the beach", or "if the train driver HAD SLOWED down, the collision WOULD HAVE BEEN avoided". u get my drift. granted, grammar is important, but colloquial usage and slang are just as crucial. they add vibrant nuances to the language and bring it to life! yet they are sorely lacking. tsk tsk. u know how important that is? im catching up on it now. imagine dear mr lee issuing a mandate that everyone in spore is to speak BBC english all the time, and that speaking singlish is a criminal offence that warrants flogging. theres goes my talkingcock.com and mrbrown show, and all the comedic acts that rely so much on singlish to deliver the punch in the jokes. and sporeans wld become sad, stiff-lipped and staid ppl..

in school, things are getting better, which is gd. im only bogged down by math and philo, which ive plenty to bitch about, possibly when i return and after finishing my 7 horrendous assignments that EVERY prof handed out with glee. IRRITATING. and i even plan to study in the train itself as i have an exam on e mon that school reopens.. boo hoo, come to think of it, id prefer a final-year assessment style to a continual evaluation one.. at least then i dun need to mug daily and can afford myself a lot more slack.

and interaction-wise, the dynamics are improving! and for that im really grateful. rem how we used to have PRC or indian or even msian and indonesian scholars back then in the days of yore of sec sch? and how we sporeans used to just hi-bye them and then keep to our very own singaporean clique? the tables are turned on me this time round, and its really tough. on one hand it makes u aware of how it wld be like to be their position, on the other, it makes u vexed at the injustice of it all. but when push comes to a shove, ud just emerge a survivor. AMEN! haha

and i just remembered this incident in sec 3. we had an orientation camp at jalan bahtera(sp?) and my class had an influx of about 10 indonesian and msian scholars. and on one of the campfire nites, we had to get into a circle and do this stupid dance that goes:

as we walk to the left, as we walk to the right
as we walk, as we walk, as we walk all night
with a heel and a toe, and a half turn-around
with a heel and a toe and a new friend found!

the tune is nice, tho the lyrics are cheesy. but can u imagine 15-yr old guys wearing PT kits doing that in a muddy field? it was quite funny, as the dance movements included doing the half turn-around behind ur partner, and then jumping in front on the guy behind ur partner on the beat "FOUND". now, that was in 1999 where BM2000, yonex and bata white shoes ruled the day, and sports shoes like nikes and reebok( quite big then i think, since adidas wasnt really in sight) could only be found in indept shoes like acs. and so i carefully treaded here and there on e field in my second pair of painfully white shoes, e 1st being caked in mud already from e day's earlier activities. all went well as i think most of e guys were careful not to splash too much. BUT. this goon of an indonesian called mark (i will nv forget his name haha) was super gungho. he was trampling around in e mud as if it were water from a baby's rose-scented bath or smth. and i knew all was gone as i slowly advanced forward in the circle when he moved backwards. and so the tragic moment came when he did e half turn-around behind his partner, and den JUMPED RIGHT INTO A MUD PATCH right in front of me. the rest was history as i cld only remember getting irritated with him for having jumped so hard e mud spashed right up to my thighs and shorts. hmm.. i think ive digressed yet again. backtrack.

ok, one gd thing is that i only do not understand slang well (moe has done its job well after all), and that in no way hinders me in my studies; and so by e grace of god, i understand everything that the teachers say and do farely well in my studies. to those french idiots who have been treating me like an invisible ghost and get frightful grades, just 4 words: vous ĂȘtes vachement minables! oh dear.. im so vindictive. but i dun really care. hah.

yesterday afternoon saw my classmates and i playing baseball and rugby in the park beside school. it was awesome, my retarded psycho-motor skills managed to serve me so well in baseball i made 5 consecutive homeruns! so proud of myself hah. and wat made it sweeter was that the weather was cool, so even with my being decked out in 3 layers, i didnt even break into a single sweat. but for rugby its a different story. now, im not one garang guy who enjoys tough 'ruggedy' sports that involve jostling and getting muddy etc. and so i played 'tactically' without getting dirty (read avoiding all the muddy patches on e field when possible lol). the jostling part couldnt be avoided of coz, and my arms still hurt from getting rammed by 1 of e guys. i wish i were much bigger-sized like them.

and im playing sports more often now than in singapore. amazing. my tubby lardy self is slowly evolving into a lean mean machine. haha yea rite. as i have a 1 1/2 hour lunch break everyday, i have lotsa time, and fats as well, to burn after lunch. and esp after ingesting dessert and cheese and a mini bread loaf daily, i feel esp unhealthy. im usually not a cheese person but e dining hall usually serves gd mild cheese tt goes v well with e soft bread, so i cant help but wipe everything out. the same thing goes for desserts. omg e cakes and eclairs and pastries and chocolate and caramel cream etc. i feel so light-headed from e sugar overload i can float above the table . oh my the irony of that statement.

and so i usually play either soccer, volleyball or basketball after lunch. i shldnt have actually. coz its so damn paiseh. for one, im like almost always the shortest guy amongst them, and secondly, they dun have retarded coordination skills that im so sadly blessed with. and so u can imagine e catastrophe when i play. i once aimed at e basket such a lousy throw my team mate stopped talking to another guy and said 'quelle chute!!' to me. i shant bother to translate that haha. till now, i wonder how i managed to be so thick-skinned and 'parade my skills' in front of them. but well, no harm done rite? ive moved on to the gym eversince, haha, its safer. and i can at least haolian about my pull-ups, coz for all their beefiness is worth, they cld only do a quarter of e no. i do haha.

one of e guys in my cls generously opened up his place for us to party last nite. and it was damn gd. he had 2 garages, so 1 of them is assigned for partying. my god. and i thought setting aside a room for theatre and ktv purposes is gd enough. in it, he has 3 couches, 2 fridges and a huge table on which e food is laid. but wat is even better is that there's a room beside e garage where he has the disc-spinning equipment, replete with shelfs of discs of all e clubbing music. he even has this disco ball hanging from e ceiling and spot lights aligned along the ceiling that throb. and by throb i really mean throb like how they do in clubs. it was fantastic. and there was free flow of champagne. shiok. i wish i can have such a place like tt. add a pool table and it wld be perfect. and all thanks to e alcohol, im much closer to my clsmates now. To clubbing, the international activity that transcends culture, language and colour! Vive l'alcool!!!

ok i betta go now. damn late!!
bonnes vacances! - Thursday, October 26, 2006 -

shalala

i feel so happy today. lessons ended early at 4, and so i can afford to come back home and slack around for a while online!! and at dear ZG's behest, ive decided to blog, though theres nothing substantial to blog about save for schwork.

that idiot was so terribly excited at the thought of having someone stalk me i wish he cld be in my shoes for just that episode. because after that fatty bom bom's squeezing, my shoes wldnt fit anymore, ok lame joke. back to last sun, it was nothing short of harrowing there and then. upon second thought, i think he would have been thrilled at the thought of having someone actually interested in stalking him. i can foresee our dear ZG beckoning the stalker over to the filthiest smelliest corner of the train interchange with that IRRESISTIBLE come-hiterto look of his; and with just a salacious licking of his lips, he would set the stalker's loins on fire...

and the same goes for shaz: yoohoo girl! how have u been? i miss ur ceaseless prattling so much! im placing u on the bloggers' pedestal by replying to ur tag here! arent you honoured? ;) c'mon, dun be shy lah, i know u cant wait to do more than just dropping of pencil boxes haha. thats so juvenile isnt it? perhaps its high time to start dropping your boxers instead. =)

ok. back to blogging proper, or rather, rubbish-accounting. lets see... what has been interesting so far? i handed e mooncakes to my prof a few wks ago and she treated me to lunch! not bad rite, e effort wasted in lunging my heavy luggage around was worth it. just 2 exotic (read: westernised flavours to suit their palates) mooncakes and i get a meal haha. of coz i offered to pay my share SEVERAL times, but well, she declined. anw she was like how suaku when i told her what mooncakes were. i hope she didnt expect to find anything moon-related inside. and how she ooh-ed and aah-ed over the box, the plastic knife that came with it, and the whole packaging. i think she needs to go over to japan, where she would be bowled over by e impressive and super-nice packaging that the jap are so renowned for. and boy would she gasp in pain/joy when she discover that toilet bowl with that water jet that shoots at where the sun doesnt shine.

ok back to topic. she brought me to this french restaurant tt looks quite posh, with gilded walls and full-length mirrors, high ceilings, and scantily-clad chubby cherubs staring out from their picture frames everywhere. ive nothing to complain about save for e price, but that isnt relevant since she paid. anyway, the moment the waiter welcomed us in and showed us the coat-hanger, i cld feel the eyes riveted on me everywhere. i dunno wassup with the goons dining there. sure, a middle-aged female caucasian walking in with a young asian boy is not a very common sight, but theres no need to care so much about it. and no need to stare so hard rite? but stared they did, from the ordering to the meal itself. and the blardy kpo couple beside us kept trying to eavesdrop. seriously ah, at times these ppl can be even more kpo than singaporeans, and that IS saying a lot.

and... theres nothing i can think about. ok just one, dun watch miami vice if u havent. my gdness, that was one lousy shitass of a film. i dozed off twice in my comfy seat watching it. tt film really CMI despite starring gong li and colin ferrell. the former really sounded gong like anything when she spoke so feebly in english. thankfully she didnt mangle up e english words as badly as my favourite zhang ziyi in tt advert when she complained that the soup was too salty. omg, tt moment was classic. it ought to be immortalized in 15 seconds of fame or smth to that effect. that zhang girl is a comedian in e making im telling you. in e event that she decides to retire from acting, she wld seriously make it big as a comedienne. just cast her in any show tt requires her to speak english and i wld crack up big time. ok lah, in all fairness she spoke quite decently in that geisha movie. and colin ferrell is just.. him. unkempt trying to pass off as cool. PUI.

oh dear, i wld have loved to continue on with my rubbish. alas, theres something even more rubbishy playing from my speakers: ZG's singing on msn. in an woeful attempt to sing soul music, he has so successfully massacred the song and my urge to blog that ive decided to go cook dinner now instead. if ive managed to sustain your interest to this very last statement, thank you and ciao!
shalala - Friday, October 06, 2006 -

n'importe quoi

having dinner break now. aimless surfing on youtube has yielded a bountiful harvest once again.

first video: even better than blaine and copperfield! MUST watch! faint-hearted ones beware!!



2nd one: in a streak of nationalistic pride, hossan leong croaked his sporean version of 'we didnt start e fire'. in it were some very funny lyrics tt brought out some idiosyncrasies which really identify us as true blue sporeans; tho whether thats smth to be proud of or not is debatable.



i came back from paris this afternoon after lunch and was stalked by a crazy old man (com) at the train platform. it was a nightmare. as i usually board the train at the last carriage for immediate access to the exit upon alighting at my station, i walked all the way to that one end of the platform where there's usually not many ppl. and there was this stupid com who followed me. at first, i didnt think anything about it. but i realised that he kept staring at me, and so i moved away. he tailed, came abreast of me, and then planted himself in front of me smiling, or rather, smirking like some dork. he was clad in a denim jacket, grey pants, and had a rolled-up newspaper in his left hand. i gathered he was 60-ish with his tufts of white hair, and thought he could possibly pass off as the nice grandpa guy in that advert for that shiok toffee caramel sweet whose name i forgot. and that was till he started rubbing his crotch with his right hand. i was like 'wth', and immediately walked away from him.

that idiot tagged along and stopped whenever i slowed down, and continued when i started zig-zagging again. i was at first irritated and turned to stare at him. he seemed dazed at first, but then he started putting on that sick expression of a smile/smirk again. i looked around, and realised that no one noticed him or me. and then he did it again; this time however, he was fingering with his zipper. and so the hide-and-seek game started. i walked briskly over to the middle, where there was a crowd, and stood beside them. that com had the cheek to follow, and stand right beside me. WTF. and whenever i looked at him, he wld repeat e whole motion of smiling and stroking. pukez. i hurried off behind the huge beefiest guy in sight and 'sought refuge' in his shadow. spastic dirty old man trailed and stood within 2m of my radius.

i started panicking a little and wondered what to do. all this while e twerp was being shifty-eyed whenever i tried to stare at him, and then when we made eye contact, he wld smile, and then start fingering himself again. i was thoroughly grossed out.

and thankfully my train came just then. i purposely chose the carriage where most people were entering, and then as the door was about to close, i sped off to the neighbouring one. i thought i managed to evade com, but as luck wld have it, he turned out to be sickeningly agile and quick on his feet. i wld have loved to see him squashed by e closing doors, but sadly, he came sailing in unharmed, smiled BROADLY this time, and of all e other vacant seats, chose to sit right in front of me.

by then, i didnt know wat to do. this time his knees were almost touching mine, and there was no mistaking his stroking, nor his expression. and the stupid lady seated beside him also blur like f**k, cannot see out of e corner of her eye that theres a pervert rubbing his crotch all e time meh? i stood up when e next station approached, and he followed suit. when he came up beside me, he said 'bonjour'. i was like, bon your fucking balls lah bonjour. i wanted to shake him off and pretended to alight last after everyone, including him, and then jumped back on at the last minute. fortunately, spastic didnt have e brains to wait for me to alight before him, or else i wldnt have managed to shake him off, and could possibly find myself in a tougher situation. shudder. wat a thought... am glad im safe and sound.

ok, break is over. revision for exam tmr round 3!
n'importe quoi - Monday, October 02, 2006 -

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